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Noonday Men's Ministry - Ten Commandments

Commandment 7 - Flee Sexual Immorality

You shall not commit adultery. (Exodus 20:14, NKJV)


Outline

Main Point: Adultery is both an external (body) and internal (mind) sin that affects your spiritual relationship (soul) with God.  Believers are to run away from sexual immorality and to the cross of Christ.

Introduction – A Serious Indictment

1. Understanding the Commandment
    A. Righteousness requires pure actions driven by pure thoughts.
    B. You were already bought at a great price.
 

2. Applying the Commandment
    A. Abraham – Guilty of Adam’s Sin.
    B. 144,000 Believers – Pure and Chaste.
    C. Some practical steps to prevent sexual immorality.

Conclusion


Introduction - A Serious Indictment

I have a serious indictment to make: Adultery is a rampant problem among men, even at our church, even among the pastoral staff! “No way!” you say?

OK, how many of you men will admit to committing adultery? None…

The command “You shall not commit adultery” (Exodus 20:14, NKJV) was taught by the LORD Jesus who explained it this way:

27 “You have heard that it was said, ‘Do not commit adultery.’ 28 But I tell you that anyone who looks at a woman lustfully has already committed adultery with her in his heart. 29 If your right eye causes you to sin, gouge it out and throw it away. It is better for you to lose one part of your body than for your whole body to be thrown into hell. 30 And if your right hand causes you to sin, cut it off and throw it away. It is better for you to lose one part of your body than for your whole body to go into hell. (Matthew 5:27-30, NIV)

So now how many of you men will admit to committing adultery? You see, all of us face the temptation to lust and “all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God” (Romans 3:23, NIV).

Adultery is a cancer of the soul that starts in the heart and, if unchecked, infects the whole body. It is a form of sexual immorality that, unfortunately, is very common today. How does adultery or sexual

1. Understanding the Commandment

A. Righteousness requires pure actions driven by pure thoughts.

16 “Are you still so dull?” Jesus asked them. 17 “Don't you see that whatever enters the mouth goes into the stomach and then out of the body? 18 But the things that come out of the mouth come from the heart, and these make a man ‘unclean.’ 19 For out of the heart come evil thoughts, murder, adultery, sexual immorality, theft, false testimony, slander. 20 These are what make a man ‘unclean’; but eating with unwashed hands does not make him ‘unclean.’ ” (Matthew 15:16-20, NIV)

Adultery is a serious offense to your spouse, your family, and your God. Lust is also a serious offense to your spouse, your family, and your God. 1 Cor. 13:5 says love does not demand its own way, but lust does:

  • Lust demeans your image or valuation of your spouse.
  • Lust for another divides your interests and breaks the “one flesh” goal of marriage.
  • Lust raises unrealistic expectations for your spouse.
  • Lust leads to adultery – adultery of the heart soon becomes adultery of the flesh.
  • Lust/adultery endangers your family health and stability.
  • Lust reveals a lack of trust in God’s provision for your life.
  • Unrestrained lust will keep you out of God’s kingdom (1 John 3:6,9)

How does Jesus’ teaching on lust square with the famous “look but don’t touch” rule?

  • It doesn’t.  Jesus' teaching is that we should not look with lust, period.

How does Jesus’ teaching on lust square with pornography or even R-rated movies containing sex/nudity?

  • It doesn’t. Jesus' teaching disallows viewing sexual images because they invoke lust by definition.

How does Jesus’ teaching on lust square with opposite sex friendships, other than your spouse?

  • It doesn’t.  Intimate friendships with opposite sex partners is a very slippery slope. I see this at work all the time – two coworkers go to lunch every day and talk about anything and everything. It will not be long before one or both has some marital issues that they begin sharing with each other. Before long the satisfaction they miss in their marriage will be filled by their friend.

This is why He says it is better to cut out that which feeds your lust than risk the fires of Hell (Matthew 5:29-30).

B. You were already bought at a great price

Since the believer's body belongs to the Lord who redeemed him at a price that cannot be repaid, he must avoid adultery [sexual immorality] at all costs:

Flee from sexual immorality. All other sins a man commits are outside his body, but he who sins sexually sins against his own body. Do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit, who is in you, whom you have received from God? You are not your own; you were bought at a price. Therefore honor God with your body. (1 Cor 6:18-20, NIV)

1. Sexual immorality must be understood as sexual lust or acts outside the confines of the marriage partner.

What is sexual immorality?

Sexual Morality is sexual union only between the consenting husband and wife (Gen. 2:24; Matt. 19:4-6).  All other sexual activity before, during, and after marriage is IMMORAL:

  • Sex between friends or strangers (affairs, prostitution, one-night stands).
  • Same sex sex whether safe sex or not.
  • Sex with anyone not your spouse (adultery, incest)
  • Child molestation including "date groping"
  • LUST for another in a sexual way (Jesus said adultery of the heart Mat. 5:28) such as pornography (now available on the internet), nudity (not just "adult entertainment" but mainstream TV now), and improper and impure thoughts toward another.

Since all of these are defined as sexual immorality and condemned in Scripture, then why does Paul consider it important to warn the church about it?

Believers are susceptible to this sin and have in large part been defeated by it.  Sexual immorality is rarely spoken against and never in such absolute terms as are given in Scripture.  Lust, in particular, is the silent sin which cripples many believers, ruins marriage relationships and families.  Paul gives this warning to the body of Christ for all time because we need it -- today more than ever.

2. Sexual immorality is a major sin which defiles the believer, the church, and the world.

Has this sin lost its shame in the church?  Certainly it has in the world.  Consider the air force pilot, Kelly Flynn, was ousted from the military because of adultery. Actually, they considered the problem of adultery much less severe than rank insubordination, for which she technically should have been dishonorably discharged.  Illicit affairs still tend to bring church leaders down.  But has lust, generally seen in addiction to pornographic material, gotten the attention and the shame it deserves in the church?

Why is sexual immorality such a problem for the believer -- after all, as Paul says in 1 Cor. 6:12 "Everything is permissible for me..." (NIV)?  Sin never brings a profit and always tries to enslave a person.  The sin of sexual immorality is:

  • 1 Cor. 5:1-5 a shameful activity that defiles the holiness of God's church.
  • 1 Cor. 5:6-8 rebellion against truth (Jesus said, "I am the Way, and the Truth..." (John 14:6, NIV).
  • 1 Cor. 5:9-13 influences others to sin.
  • 1 Cor. 6:9-11 denies the unbeliever entrance to God's kingdom because one cannot hold sin and the cross.  As the old hymn "Rock of Ages" explains: "In my hand no price I bring, Simply to Thy cross I cling"
  • 1 Cor. 6:12-17 defiles the body which is meant for the Lord Jesus Christ.
  • 1 Cor. 6:18 confuses the spiritual aspect of the sexual union which transcends the physical.

Sexual immorality is a major sin which infects the believer, tearing down his resistance much like a virus. Left unchecked, it will always lead to greater and more frequent sin.

3. Sexual immorality must be avoided by the active, on-going commitment of the believer to the Lord.

Paul makes it clear that God desires and requires a PURE CHURCH:

  • Note that Paul clearly shows that we cannot separate ourselves from all unbelievers in the world: this would be impossible. The problem is sin INSIDE the church not outside.

Paul makes it clear that God desires and requires PURE BELIEVERS:

  • Know who you are (washed--1 Cor. 6:11, holy temple-- 1 Cor. 6:19).
  • Know whose you are (bought at a price--1 Cor. 6:19-20).
  • Flee (180 degree turn) from temptation.
  • Always be fleeing is the tense of the verb for "flee."
  • On sexual temptation, John MacArthur said: "We are not to consider it a spiritual challenge to be met but a spiritual trap to be escaped. We should get away as fast as we can." [1]

In the end, we must realize that we do not exercise authority or self-rule over ourselves -- in Christ, the believer is owned lock, stock, and barrel by God.

2. Applying the Commandment

A. Abraham – Guilty of Adam’s Sin

(1)When Abram was ninety-nine years old, the LORD appeared to Abram and said to him, "I am Almighty God; walk before Me and be blameless. (2) "And I will make My covenant between Me and you, and will multiply you exceedingly." (3) Then Abram fell on his face, and God talked with him, saying: (4) "As for Me, behold, My covenant is with you, and you shall be a father of many nations. (5) "No longer shall your name be called Abram, but your name shall be Abraham; for I have made you a father of many nations. (6) "I will make you exceedingly fruitful; and I will make nations of you, and kings shall come from you. (7) "And I will establish My covenant between Me and you and your descendants after you in their generations, for an everlasting covenant, to be God to you and your descendants after you. (8) "Also I give to you and your descendants after you the land in which you are a stranger, all the land of Canaan, as an everlasting possession; and I will be their God." (Genesis 17:1-8, NKJV)

Abram disobeyed God and committed adultery with Sarah's servant, Hagar (Gen. 16).  Even though this was at Sarah's request (for she wanted a son so badly), Abram sinned against God's command for marriage from Gen. 2:24-25. God's design for marriage is one man, one woman, for life. As a result of Abram's sin, God did not speak again for thirteen years.

In the LORD we can find forgiveness and reconciliation. Abram was reconciled to God through the grace He extends to each of us in His Son, Jesus Christ. We find Abram in verse 3 falling on his face before the Almighty -- an appropriate posture for any of us to take when God speaks.

B. 144,000 Believers – Pure and Chaste

(1) Then I looked, and behold, a Lamb standing on Mount Zion, and with Him one hundred and forty-four thousand, having His Father's name written on their foreheads. (2) And I heard a voice from heaven, like the voice of many waters, and like the voice of loud thunder. And I heard the sound of harpists playing their harps. (3) They sang as it were a new song before the throne, before the four living creatures, and the elders; and no one could learn that song except the hundred and forty-four thousand who were redeemed from the earth. (4) These are the ones who were not defiled with women, for they are virgins. These are the ones who follow the Lamb wherever He goes. These were redeemed from among men, being firstfruits to God and to the Lamb. (5) And in their mouth was found no deceit, for they are without fault before the throne of God. (Revelation 14:1-5, NKJV)

1. God has special rewards for His children who live in integrity and purity.

In Revelation 14:1, we see another picture around God's throne in Heaven as we see the Lamb of God on Mount Zion.  We know this is in Heaven because Jesus has not returned to the Earth as of yet. He is with 144,000 very special believers.

What does this group represent?  This group of believers has a special place before the throne of God because of the conduct of their lives.  There are some Bible teachers who emphasize God's grace to the exclusion of other important doctrines, such as the pursuit of holiness.  Many believers are lulled into the idea that they can simply "rest" in God's grace and not worry about following Christ!  This is what happens when we fail to study and teach the whole counsel of God.  The 144,000 believers "follow the Lamb wherever He goes" (14:4) indicating they set their sights on following Christ. This was their primary goal.

These believers remained pure and honest in all of life. This is not to say they were perfect. Romans 3:23 still holds true for the 144,000. But as they began each day and throughout each day, these committed believers pursued holiness, purity, and integrity in their lives. God is concerned about the conduct of your life. He has a special reward for these 144,000 believers. Are you pursuing holiness, purity, and integrity in your life? If so, you may be among this special group sealed with the name of God the Father on your forehead!

2. Note the conduct of these believers.

The 144,000 have the unique privilege of singing a new song (Revelation 14:3), obviously taught to them by the Lamb of God Himself (Rev. 14:1).  Again, there are eternal rewards for faithfulness to Christ which are incomprehensible to us here on Earth.  But these rewards are absolutely certain because they are promised by God (1 Cor. 3:14) and kept by His power (1 Peter 1:4-5).

In Revelation 14:4, the 144,000 were sexually pure and that is the tremendous commendation of this verse.  Following Christ by faith, they overcame the temptation of lust and immorality that has been present in the world since the fall of humanity.  Note that they were not sexually pure because they were virgins.  Their virginity is an additional fact of their lives.  The main point is that they were sexually pure.

Sexual intimacy does not defile a person before God so long as it is between a man and woman married to each other (you have to be very specific these days).  It is given to a man and woman who commit themselves to a lifetime union of their entire lives (Gen. 2:24).  The union between a man and woman who are married is even commanded (1 Cor. 7:3-5).  Finally, Hebrews 13:4 clearly shows that it is adultery and fornication which defile one before God, not sexual intimacy between two who are lawfully married.  So Rev. 14:4 does not teach celibacy as a "holier" lifestyle than marriage.  Rather, it agrees with the rest of Scripture that overcoming the temptations of adultery and fornication are highly commended by God.  The follower of Christ will turn away from such lusts and turn instead to the living LORD Jesus Christ for strength, contentment, and ultimate redemption.

Integrity begins deep in the heart of a person (Rev 14:5). God considers in the thought process one's motives, secret plans, and longings.  One with no deceit begins with a motive or purpose of glorifying God.  The plan in one's heart is to follow God's will.  And the longing of one's heart is to do that which pleases the LORD.  Genuine integrity in one's life will not be possible until the inner thoughts are set in order.  Jesus explained clearly that our actions are driven by what is inside us (Matthew 12:34-35; Mark 7:20-23).  Integrity driven by the purpose of glorifying God will bear the fruit of righteous conduct.

Keep in mind that honest living is the result of inner integrity. Time will reveal such a hidden virtue. If one is honest with the LORD Jesus Christ, to whom the believer owes his or her life, then one will be honest with others. If one cannot be honest with God, then how can one expect to live with integrity? Let it be said of you that "no lie was found in your mouth." Just as the 144,000 found, a man or woman who tells the truth is called "blameless." There will be nothing anyone can honestly hold against a person of integrity.

Without fault before the throne of God – when a believer approaches the throne of God, he/she will be without fault. The holiness of God will shine right through all the dark pride bringing confession and repentance. It is a natural part of drawing close to God.

C. Some practical steps to prevent sexual immorality

  • Keep your eyes focused on eye contact - "I have made a covenant with my eyes; Why then should I look upon a young woman?” (Job 31:1, NIV). When talking with a woman or looking at a woman, keep your eyes on her eyes – never go below the nose!
  • The “bounce away” method is described by Stephen Arterburn – train yourself when confronted with a visual images that stimulate lust to look away as soon as possible. Whether it is a click of the remote control on a graphic TV show or movie scene, a scantily clad coworker or jogger, look away quickly – bounce your eyes to something good.
  • Avoid places where you may be tempted - "25 Do not let your heart turn to her ways or stray into her paths. 26 Many are the victims she has brought down; her slain are a mighty throng. 27 Her house is a highway to the grave, leading down to the chambers of death" (Proverbs 7:25-27, NIV) – such as a particular part of town you choose not to drive by anymore, or the computer at night after your wife has gone to bed… turn it off.
  • Guard your heart – "22 The eye is the lamp of the body. If your eyes are good, your whole body will be full of light. 23 But if your eyes are bad, your whole body will be full of darkness. If then the light within you is darkness, how great is that darkness!" (Matthew 6:22-23, NIV). What you allow as input through your eyes will drive you to or away from lust. Replace lustful thoughts with godly thoughts through earnest, diligent study of God’s word. Lay down godly tracks - godly ways of thinking - in your mind.

Conclusion

Jill Briscoe tells in her testimony of growing up with the "wild crowd." She ran with the wrong people and did the wrong things. One day she was with one of her friends when her older sister walked by. Her sister saw who she was with and called her off to the side. "Jill," her sister said, "if you get pregnant, it will kill your father." Jill said that she thought about that a long time...because she loved her father deeply. A couple of weeks later she said she was with her boyfriend and he was trying to get her into bed. He tried everything and finally said, "The only reason you won't do it is because of what your father will do to you." "No," she said, "that isn't true. The reason I won't do it is because of what I would do to my father."

Our heavenly Father gave a priceless gift to redeem us from sin. To commit sexual immorality of any kind tramples this priceless gift in the dust, making the cross a mockery of our Father's love for us. You are not your own -- you were bought at a price. Therefore, honor God with your body by remaining pure in a perverted world that will one day pass away.

20 My son, keep your father's commands and do not forsake your mother's teaching. 21 Bind them upon your heart forever; fasten them around your neck. 22 When you walk, they will guide you; when you sleep, they will watch over you; when you awake, they will speak to you. 23 For these commands are a lamp, this teaching is a light, and the corrections of discipline are the way to life, 24 keeping you from the immoral woman, from the smooth tongue of the wayward wife. 25 Do not lust in your heart after her beauty or let her captivate you with her eyes, 26 for the prostitute reduces you to a loaf of bread, and the adulteress preys upon your very life. 27 Can a man scoop fire into his lap without his clothes being burned? 28 Can a man walk on hot coals without his feet being scorched? 29 So is he who sleeps with another man's wife; no one who touches her will go unpunished. (Proverbs 6:20-29, NIV)

 

End Notes

[1] (The MacArthur New Testament Commentary, Moody Press: Chicago, copyright 1984, p. 151)

 

©  Copyright 2005, Randy Lariscy.


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